GOING BACK IS IMPOSSIBLE, BUT MAKING A MISTAKE ISN'T

We all wish our life had an undo button. We all have been in that situation saying “why did I do that”, “I shouldn’t have said that”, “I could have done much better”, etc…

And even if those phrases were as simple as “I should have studied for that test” or as meaningful as “why did I say I love you”, the feeling is the same, you just wish you could go back and fix everything, do it all over again, after all, everybody deserves a second chance right? But (quoting a song I love) “you don’t get another chance, life is no Nintendo game”.

That moment when you fall, that moment you said something that got you in trouble, that thing you did that hurt someone, that question you didn’t know how to answer…you, now, know how to react for those things, but somehow you wish you had knew better before. Before that mistake, before that fight, before that failure…you wish you could go back and tell yourself what’s the right thing to do…but you can’t, and you get sad, frustrated, angry, etc. remembering that moment once and twice; that 2 minutes that changed your life forever.

Recently I’ve been in that situation, a lot. I got into a fight with my mom because out of anger I said something I shouldn’t. I got my heart broken for rushing that “I like you” that was answered with an “I don’t”. I disappointed myself by missing a huge opportunity because I didn't practice my audition routine enough, and if I could go back I’ll do it all perfect this time (the way it should have been)…I’ll change that “I don’t need you” for an “I love you mom”, I’ll shut up my feelings for that guy, and I’ll definitively practice that monologue so much, I could act it in my sleep.

But since I can't and none of you can't, we resign ourselves with just the fact that we are wiser now, and hopefully we won’t mess up again in the future. Because sure, people can forgive you, but things are never the same as they were before, and sure, you have more opportunities in life, but you missed the once you wanted, and sure, you will find another significant other, but your heart will be cautious forever.

-Claire