THE BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD

 
I'm sure all of us have felt great many times in our lives, but sadly all of that seems to fade away or come to an end sooner or later...but why is that?...that's because we depend on other things to feel good, if you depend on someone to feel good, whenever that someone disappoints you, or walks away, your happiness is over. If you depend on things to feel good, whenever you are broke, or you lose or break your things, your happiness is over. So since the problem seems to be that you can't rely on outside factors to make you happy, the solution to this has to simply be to start relying only on yourself to be happy.

I started to put this into practice and I found out one of the best ways to make yourself happy is to accomplish things, there is no better feeling than that of being proud of yourself. I recently graduated from a film scholarship, as well as valedictorian from a theater scholarship, and in 9 days I'll be graduating from high school, I performed last week two original theater plays, one of them as the lead character in an amazing theater in Manhattan! and right now I'm working on getting an internship with an outstanding acting company as well as auditioning for an acting scholarship this summer with a noted acting school here in NYC. Why do I feel so amazing? why am I so happy? because even though my boyfriend broke up with me, my dad is mad at me, my mom is so busy I barely see her, and I miss my BTFs like crazy...I have to thank no one, but myself and God for all of these achievements! because no one can take away from me what I earned for myself!

So if you ever feel blue, or down, just remember you don't depend on anyone to be happy. Thank God that you are alive, go out and do something for yourself, do something that makes you feel good, do what makes you happy! whether it is to succeed in something like me, or something you are passionate about like acting, dancing, or painting, give yourself a treat of your favorite food, or buy something nice for yourself...whatever it is, just do it if it makes you happy, and NEVER wait for others to do for you what makes you happy, because happiness doesn't come from others...happiness is a state of mind...happiness is a choice.

- Claire

WHAT MAKES ME ANGRY

My brain is shut and it doesn't know what to write about, so I've decided to write about: IZZIE not posting in the blog!! YEAH EMMA!! YOU! 
She's SO lazy, besides she doesn't get this seriously -.- 
UGH, I'm tired of fighting with her because of this... So, I'll leave it to Claire :)
Well... That's it, haha, sorry... :) I hope you enjoy :)
XXXO
-Camille
P.S: Izzie, when you read this: NOW THAT YOU ARE ON VACATIONS YOU DON'T HAVE EXCUSES!!! I love you :)

LET'S ALL WISH A REALLY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO Claire!!!

Hon, we love you a lot and I pray to God to give me more years with you as my best friend, even in the distance, because this friendship is beautiful.

Thanks for being such a wonderful person that makes the world a nicer place everyday, because everything we do that shows love, makes the world go round.

I wish you the best in the years to come, and all of the blessings God can give you forever.

WE LOVE YOU!

-Me

I KNOW I'M WRONG, BUT I HAVE THE RIGHT TO STAY THAT WAY!!!

Ok, so we've all been in those situations where we are hard-headed and stubborn, and we know we are wrong BUT WE DON'T CARE! because if we are wrong, and we know we are wrong, and we stay that way, its because we freaking want to! so we just hope and wish people stop being slow and get it!

There's nothing more irritating than having someone try to give you some wise words of advise, in that calm-adult voice they have, acting like they know everything, feeling all mature...or those people who make the worst attempts of pep talk ever...when they don't know shit! bitch you are not me, you have no idea how I feel, you've got no clue of what's best for me, and if being stubborn and acting like an ass is fucking making me feel better, then get the hell out of my way!

Yeah yeah...I know what you are thinking...you're thinking I'm not right, that I should be writing peaceful words of how you have to listen to others because they care about you and stuff like that...well guess what? even if I'm wrong I have the right to stay this way! and let me tell you something, if you were pissed like I am, and mad and upset and sad and depressed and hopeless and stressed and frustrated and irritated and heart broken like I am, then you would agree with me right now...

I'm really sorry you had to read this...and I hope my post doesn't change anyone's mood, for some lighter reading check on us in a few days to read next week's post...and from the bottom of my heart I wish you all never to feel this way, because it sucks, but if you ever feel like I do, then I'm deeply sorry, and good luck...


- Claire

PASSION IS ETERNAL LOVE

 

In dance class, my teacher assigned each of us a feeling so we could… express it through a song. Guess which feeling was assigned to me? PASSION! 

What is PASSION? What is that thing that everyone talks about? How can I put that in the scenario when I don’t know what the HELL is?! 

If you search Wikipedia, passion is: *intellectual accent* a very strong feeling about a person or thing. Well… as soon as I found this definition I start thinking, WHAT TO DO?! I thought of a bull, of love, of… ANYTHING! But at the end I found my real passion: MY DREAM. 

I found out that just being on the scenario performing is my passion. The lights, the audience, the adrenaline, my dreams, being an artist, being admire for what I do; that’s it. 

Passion is the motor that helps me stand for what I want, for the dreams God gave me. Passion is an eternal love for acting, dancing and singing. Passion is that something that won’t let me quit. 

Passion never dies, is always there, and let me tell you something: if you are not passionate for what you do, you just weren't born for that. 

Follow your dreams, God gave them to you so you can chase them, catch them and live them. Don’t give up on what you love, want and wish. Never quit the battle if you haven’t fight and always stand for what you believe. 

Life's a long road, keep walking. 

KEEP DREAMING. 

XXOO 

-Camille 

P.S: “Don’t let the fear of striking you out; keep you from playing the game.” –Cinderella Story

Let the bad times roll...and the good ones, too.

Lately we've been quite absent in the blog but that doesn't mean we stopped loving each other, that doesn't mean our lives aren't fun and hectic...it's just we've been quite busy with all of that, and now we're back to tell you all about it.

I have to admit, my life's been quite a mess (and not all bad, I'm just not prepared for all this shit) in every single possible way, after that terrible depression from December (don't get me wrong, I'm not depressive, I only had this one terrible month at the end of last year).

I started college (finally) this year, and concerning this topic, I had some cold feet in the middle of the semester about the major I'd chosen. 

But warming up into the important topic here, I'm gonna start from the beginning: we met last year at a close mutual friend's arty and we only spoke a couple of times because he lives quite away. We started speaking around Jan and hit it off right away, he liked me, and the fact that he was so wrong and unavailable for me, made him so desirable to me...despite that he was not that attractive, I starting liking him and wanting all about him after 3 months speaking...and Spring break was coming, and we were about to meet. Long story short, he told me he was seeing someone, truth is, I was seeing someone too, here in my city. We saw each other, and for the first time in my life I felt so many things at the same time.

It's true about me, that I'm kind of a guy when it comes to feelings and relationships, as my friends say...I'm a little jerk about it, I find it hard to trust and hard to love someone that way. 

Previously, and correct me if I'm wrong, or if that post was deleted, but you know I made some mistakes last year, when it comes to guys...speaking more specifically, I behaved a little with the morals of a guy...if you know what I mean...

Okay, so getting back in track, I felt I didn't care about anything, I wanted to do whatever I wanted, no matter the consequences and no matter what my heart and mind told me: it was all wrong, and the price, I had to pay with guilt and hardness in heart. I wanted all of him so bad, and I couldn't understand why; I wanted him to remember me, have something from me, that even if it was easy for him to get from other women, I wanted to give to him, and to have me as a good reference about it.

I know my attributes, I feel better looking and I know that I was the one he wanted to be with...but the coldness in his heart only expressed how he could only think one minute at a time, and that speaking and skypeing with me every day for three months, meant nothing from one day to another. 

I thought I was tough and could handle all of it, but when he left, it was exactly like Gotye's song, he was just somebody that I USED to know...or at least the little part he showed me, and I liked...I tried so many new things, I learned new things, and experienced so many new stuff...(don't get me wrong, not everything I say has to do with sex)...even if I confess that I am kind of like a guy about it...I think about sex almost all the time....jajaja

Well, I thought everything wouldn't matter when he left because I had someone here...but when things got tense and that thing I had with this other guy made me realize how consuming that was, I couldn't stop thinking of him, and how bad I wanted him...because I couldn't make him mine, not even when he was here...but I felt happy when we were together, that was the only moment I didn't feel wasted, and I like those memories, and I cherish them, because that's all I'm gonna have.

The thing with the guy here didn't work, and I started weighing opportunities other guys, and the ones I had friend-zoned so bad...how much I deserved guys like them...but I didn't want to do it only for the heck of not being alone...

So here I am, finally ending this semester, still having some second thoughts, and well....we still speak to each other, I have to admit I'm in great terms with all of those guys...friends and...well...whatever you want to call the other two...I wanted to see him again, and the only thing that made my feet come back to the ground, was the fact that he told me some cold truth, and I loved that, I loved that so much, that even if the rest of my life is full of other complicated stuff, he makes me tougher, and better in some awesome way...I love that.

I'm not sorry for this long post, it makes me feel relieved. I AM sorry that I'm not gonna post some of those hipster/emo/kinda-weird pictures, I just don't like them...maybe one day I find some cool pictures worth posting here from my behalf...and I know you'll enjoy them.

The desire is not going anywhere, but I'm still here, and I'm glad I feel that way, because it makes me human. There's nothing wrong with how you feel, because they are your feelings, no one can judge them, they are simply yours.

Happily trying to make this easier to get written, and to be responsible, 

lots of love

-Me :)

WE ARE BACK!

First of all, let me say we are sorry for our long absence, we realize we are very inconstant, but we promised to ourselves and to you to take this blog seriously. We organized our schedules in order for you (our lovely readers) to have a new post every Tuesday!

As some people may know it's very hard to stay constant in anything we try, I'm sure some of this phrases sound familiar to some of you “I'll stick with my diet at least one month” “I'll be a good student this entire semester” “I'll go to the gym twice a week” but, as many things in life, its hard to stay constant. We get bored, busy, forget, or lose interest in things. Most of the time we let life happen as if we were mere audience, instead of living our role and developing the play like we want it. When life goes by, we forget the important things in life, we get consumed in school, work and daily shores and forget about enjoying every minute of it, our family, our friends, our beliefs...

My BTFs are one of those important things I never want to neglect, and being the one who's farthest away, I feel the need to do everything possible to feel closer to them...like this blog! and when I realized this, I decided to drag my BTFs into my same spirit and revive our blog!

So dear readers, enjoy!

- Claire

HBD CLAIRE!!

-Emma, Izzie and Camille

Everything Has An End

“When life offers you a dream so  far beyond any of your expectations, 

it’s not reasonable to grieve when it comes to an end.” -Twilight

What happens when you meet someone soooo special, sweet, caring...perfect? Usually we start to doubt, right? Is he acting? Lying? Or...why me? I'm sure he can find someone prettier, smarter, funnier...Well let me tell you something...Trust in yourself, don't question him and don't question the magic. Ok, yes, maybe he's lying, and its very probable that things might end, and they might end bad, and you might end hurt...but even if that happens, the smile you once had was real, and what you felt was real...and you should never regret anything that once made you smile. So we know that when things are too good to be true, they are usually not...but is not worth to walk away, just out of fear of getting hurt, because even if your fairytale tears apart, it would still have been a farytale once. And its way better to look back and say “It was good while it lasted” than look back and say “I wonder what would have happened”, because if something ends quick, it doesn't mean it wasn't meant to be, it means it was meant to be, just not forever.

-Claire

HELLO AGAIN!

Ok, so, I'm really sorry I haven't posted anything since November :O. I wanted to post something, but the problem was I didn't know what to write about; so I ended up doing an update on my life...For those of you who might find this not interesting (sorry to disappoint you) but I find posts to be a great way to unburden everything inside me. So here we go:

• My little brother, who I love with all my heart, turned 6 on November. He already knows how to write so he sent me this adorable letter! I cried when I saw this on the mail (as you might assume he lives in Colombia). My baby sis turned 2 on December. She's so cranky (haha) but so sweet, she even learned how to say my name so when I call she asks to speak to me, aww.
• On Christmas I got the most amazing surprise/present of all! The doorbell rang and when I opened the door my favorite uncle was standing right there with his girlfriend, which I also love! Awesome holidays with my colombian family. Also on December i broke up with my boyfriend because of other guy, haha who I dated for almost a month, until he make it very clear we were not official so I had no right to make drama over the fact that he had kissed another girl -.- did I mention already I'm a magnet for jerks? 
• On January I passed all my freaking Regents! woohoo! (Government exams which are requirement to graduate) and finished my 1st semester with an average of 96%! I have to keep up ‘cause I'm planning on applying to NYU...yes, yes for those of you who are wondering, NYU is where Dakota Fanning goes, but FYI normal people can get accepted too (with a great average, SAT scores, audition, interview, and application essay, haha good luck to me)
• On February was Valentine's Day which I spent with the most important person in my life, the truly deserver of my love...my mommy hahaha. March and what has gone by of April, have been really monotonous: school, gym, friends, work, acting...and back to school, gym, etc; with one little exception: HIS name is Ulian, Albanian, 18 years old, tall, smart, amazing...
• Finally, my artistic life: so for those of you who don't know, I'm passionate about acting, I'm doing what’s humanly possible to pursue my dream. So the good news are: I got the leading role on a NYC Film Festival contestant movie, called “Pressure”, I got casted as Jamie “the pretty, rich, popular but default bitch” which I love ‘cause it’s totally opposite of what I am. I've been part of projects such as Twylight Zones, Lectern, Bat Mitzvah Confidential (going to Cannes), The Most Amazing Christmas Play, an Ad Campaign for a new apparel line, one TV commercial and two dancing shows. 

I'm really happy since I'm starting to get paid jobs with companies like ABC and Paramount Pictures :D. Although people in the business tell me starting is a piece of cake, it’s getting to the next level (agent-leading paid jobs) where people fail.

Let me end up by saying life does have its ups and downs, but it’s all about the journey, not the destination. “The best way to make your dreams come true is to stop talking and start doing” - Walt Disney

-Claire